In the early '90s it seemed that Vivid Video made a lot of movies that
featured one actress as the 'loop girl'; she would introduce the movie by
talking about herself and what gets her off, she'd usually be masturbating
with a dildo then introduce other couples to us engaging in ho-hum sex, all
with no connection to eachother. After each scene is over, we go back to the
loop girl, who usually doesn't look any more excited than when we last saw
her and she goes on with words that you can tell are being read from a script.
What "Tropic Of Kahlia" fails to provide in heat, it makes up for with genuine
enthusiasm (but barely). Ok, perhaps there is a bit of genuine heat, but it
becomes lost with all the looping.
When you read the movie box for this one, you'll find the names P.J. Sparxx,
Deidre Holland, Jon Dough and Nick East listed (who aren't even in the movie).
Only three names from the real cast are actually there. An attractive photo
of Kahlia posing among some bamboo sticks and wearing a flower in her hair is
probably the only strong point this movie has going for it (and for those of
you who haven't seen Kahlia, she's a slim Hawaiian girl with extremely small
breasts and shoulder length curly hair, who is kind of cute overall). Upon
reading the back cover, you find out that Kahlia's name means 'sensuality'.
She is more sensual than aggressive and thankfully she shows emotion in her
scenes rather than just laying there quietly and looking bored.
Looking at the front cover again, you'll notice "Vivid presents an island
fantasy" written at the top. Besides deceiving us on who's actually starring
in it, this whole movie doesn't really take place on an island. I think THAT
was Vivid's fantasy. Kahlia's loop scenes take place outdoors and she's
sitting on a patio chair. In the background we do see an ocean but that's
about it (we do see the ocean first during the opening credits). Other than
that, two scenes appear indoors and the other two outdoors (one on a tennis
court and the other in a gazebo, which is situated right near the water so I
guess this counts, too).
Without further ado, here's my review.
TROPIC OF KAHLIA
director: Nancy Nemo, 1991 Vivid
rating: 1.15
- Kahlia (introduction)
- Kahlia (anal), Cal Jammer
- Kahlia, Leanna Foxx
- Madison, Biff Malibu
- Racquel Darrian, Derek Lane
- Kahlia (masturbation)
Kahlia introduces the movie by telling us (through narration) that she loves
the outdoors. She sits there with a dildo and massages her pussy over her
bikini. She says she loves the sky and the birds and the trees and that
there are so many things you can do outside. Her favorite thing of all is
getting her body all worked up and perspiring. She says that after a long
set of tennis, she gets so hot that she has to cool herself down with
whomever she's with at the time. We cut to a tennis court match with Kahlia
and (the late) Cal Jammer. They're both playing tennis horribly. Cal, who
seems to be playing her instructor or something, picks up two balls and hits
them one after the other. Then they end the game, Kahlia approaches Cal and
he tells her she's not going to learn anything by playing the way she does.
Suddenly he goes up behind her and hugs her tightly. "Say uncle," he tells
her, "Say uncle or I'm gonna take your clothes off" (???). Obviously, they
had to improvise. Kahlia refuses and he says, "Say uncle or I'm gonna fuck
you in the ass". That's exactly what they end up doing.
They start kissing and taking eachother's clothes off. He
starts sucking her boobs then makes his way down to her
pussy, pushing her slightly back as she lays down on a
lawnchair. He licks her clit mildly then slow fingers her.
Stretched out, Kahlia has a nice looking body (no protruding
ribs that makes a body sickly-looking). Then they fuck
missionary style; slowly at first, then picking up the pace.
Next, they fuck doggie style immediately proceeding with
anal sex (Cal having to hold his dick at the base the entire
time he's penetrating). Kahlia seems to enjoy it enough.
Finally (after several minutes of looping), Kahlia goes to
her knees and sticks out her tongue to catch Cal's load.
Most of it misses her face. She grabs his cock and swirls
her tongue around his head then he bends down to kiss her.
Kahlia continues telling us about the outdoors and how some people long for
the freedom of being under a blue sky with the world spread out before them,
to forget the convention of civilization and once again become wild animals.
We cut to a gazebo with Kahlia and Leanna Foxx.
Both girls are tonguing eachother at first, then Leanna
quickly takes off Kahlia's top and tongues her boobs,
flicking her tongue around Kahlia's hard nipples. Kahlia
lays back and Leanna licks her clit and slightly spanks
it, then holds two fingers around her pussy lips and rubs
up and down. Kahlia returns the favor by giving Leanna a
spirited tongue and finger-fuck session. The girls whip
out a dildo with a cockhead on each end and start playing
with it; licking the tips, rubbing it between their boobs,
etc. When they both end up fucking the dildo, Leanna goes
wild and starts screaming (perhaps a little too fake, just
like her large breasts) and right at the climax of things,
the scene fades out. Oh well, at least Leanna looked
pretty the way her hair was styled and both girls seemed
to enjoy themselves.
Kahlia explains that there's something about the warm sunlight and the soft
gentle breeze that can get a girl's hormones in an uproar, that if the mood
is right, you can get a girl to do just about anything you want her to do.
Cut to Madison and Biff Malibu indoors.
The scenario is that Madison (who looks a little trashy
here and is wearing her neck and tongue pierce) is waiting
in a building for Biff (who also looks trashy with a full
blown (fake?) goatee) to finish filming a sex scene. He
enters the room and she tells him how horny she got when
she heard him earlier. They immediately jump eachother.
He sucks her, she sucks him, they dirty talk it half of
the time. Madison does the cowgirl next, eagerly riding
his cock. The pace picks up and they fuck like banshees.
Afterwards, Madison lays on her back and fingers her pussy
while Biff strokes himself off to a cum. When he does, he
showers her pussy and inner thigh. For those of you who
like sleazy sex, this scene may be your cup of tea (just
remember that looping plays a big part in all the scenes).
Discussing more about getting a girl to do whatever you want her to do,
Kahlia tells us that when a couple lay out along the grass and watch clouds
lazily drift by, their thoughts begin to stray towards a more passionate
state and at this point, the guy can pretty much get whatever he wants. Cut
to Racquel Darrian and Derek Lane indoors (on some cheesy-looking porn set).
There's nothing you haven't seen this couple do before.
Racquel has looked better but they do manage to crank out
a scene that is just a tad above ho-hum. Sucking Derek's
cock, Racquel looks determined to please her man. Then
she does a very nice (and nicely captured) RC that lasts
long enough for you to remember about the looping. They
switch to a doggie fuck, bringing down the heat a little
(Derek looks tired as hell) that you may want to FF
through to the finale where she gives him a good handjob
until he shoots a load, but it completely misses her,
only dripping down her hand.
Finishing things off, Kahlia decides she's pretty much said it all and tells
us to go out there and try it. She proceeds by sliding off her bikini bottom
and dildo-fucking herself. She bends over onto the patio chair, showing off
her nice round ass. She screams to orgasm, penetrating herself faster. Then
she sits back down and licks the shiny, silver dildo which you can see has
cum on it. Fade out.
If you can get past the looping and the extremely dull coloring, maybe you'll
be able to sit this one through with a little help from your remote control.
Recommended strictly for Kahlia fans (I think this is the only movie she's
done that has her featured in the title role - meanwhile, I think everyone
else would be asking, "Kahlia who??"), this tape would've done a whole lot
better with more thought put into it (and isn't this the case with many other
videos?). Like I said, there's genuine enthusiasm surfacing each scene but
overall, if this 'tropic' was a destination spot I'd tell you there are tons
of other places much, much hotter.
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