Stars: Tony Tedeschi, Tyffany Million, Debi Diamond, Jordan Lee, Brooke Waters, Amber Woods (a.k.a. Sharise), Teri Diver, Dave Hardman, Luc Wylder.
Despite the director's reputation, this one is not a man-bashing fiesta and in fact is quite an amusing little spoof on the superhero genre. It begins with Tedeschi (Hourman) applying for a job at "Superheroes Inc.", a place run by Tyffany Million in a daft lycra costume. When asked what his abilities are he simply replies "I can keep my dick hard for a whole hour". She tells him to go home, basically, but he insists that she hear his story.
It begins with him and Brooke Waters (Ugly brunette with very bad skin, in case you haven't seen her yet. I hadn't) in the bedroom. Tony's wearing nerd glasses and has a silly voice. He also cums (Off screen) in about two seconds. Brooke gets pissed because he's no good in bed and throws him out, calling over her girlfriend Amber Woods (This is actually Sharise, Nick East's old girlfriend. She hasn't changed all that much since then except that her skin seems a bit worse than usual) for a bit of g/g action. The scene isn't too bad, Sharise was always nice to look at, but Brooke's butt-ugly and it gets a bit tiresome watching these two shove beads and dildoes and whatever else they can lay their hands on up each other's greasy-looking assholes for nigh on ten minutes. Also, both girls look as if they haven't washed for a few days....
Anyway, the story continues with Tony mixing up some secret formula to do some kind of weird atomic shit, but after he drinks it, he finds that all it does is make his dick hard. Not wanting to waste this, he heads off to Brooke's house. However, on the way he sees Teri Diver and Debi Diamond rob a bank, so he pursues them back to their secret hide-out. They see him and begin chasing after him in a sequence that features a very nice overhead camera shot of the three of them running down the road, indicating a budget of more than $10. nice. Anyway, Tony gets home, out of breath and within seconds the two girls have followed him in. They catch sight of his hard on and decide that instead of killing him, they want to screw him (What a surprise, eh?). This is a fairly straightforward threesome, although there are some weeeeeird positions courtesy of Miss Diamond who really can twist her body into some strange positions. The cum shot is also a tad bizarre and difficult to describe. It may have worked with Peter North, but Tony can't hack it. After he cums Teri says "Look he's still hard" looking at Tony desperately trying to prop up his limp member in his hand!
The next scene has Diver and Diamond telling their boss, Jordan Lee, that they're quitting organized crime to become pornstars. Hourman has converted them to the pleasures of the flesh, they say! Jordan's unimpressed, makes some boring speech about people not needing to have sex at all, then calls in her assistants Dave Hardman and Luc Wylder for a DP. Not brilliant. Luc lies there like a human dildo for several minutes underneath Miss Lee, while Dave penetrates from the front. After Dave's finished, he vanishes, never to be seen again and Luc jumps in on the front and finishes there too, with both cum shots being unimpressive and unimaginative. Yawn....
Now we flash back to Tyffany's office where she's getting turned on by Tony's story. Therefore we are "treated" to several minutes of her masturbating. This didn't much for me, but then again I have an annoying tendency to compareall masturbation scenes to Traci's in "Young & Restless 2". Tyf's really looking old, and putting on some serious pounds to the stomach. So... After this interlude, Tony continues his tale..
He has recieved a note in the post from Madame X (Jordan Lee) asking him to come to the hideout for a show down if he ever wants to see his girlfriend again. There's a few minutes of amusement as Tony tries on some different superhero costumes (preparation for his grand entrance) and throws himself into the enemy HQ. Some amusing dialogue follows, as Tony rips off Jordan's clothes and says :
Tony : You've got no clothes on!
Jordan : And you've got a hard on!
And they screw. Very dull, with some possible looping going on here, and a "facial" which may have happened but I for one missed it. Tony made the Agonized-Cumming-Faces but nothing came out. Anyway, he rescues his chick, who's been tied up throughout this whole scene, and after she's begged him for sex, tells her that his penis is not for her, it's for fighting crime all over the world. Flash-forward, now to Tyffany's office, where (SURPRISE, SURPRISE!) she screws Tony. There's some DP with a dildo going on (If you count that as DP) but otherwise it's standard sex. The facial at the end is average, helped a lot by a nice camera angle, but that's about all. It ends with the line :
Tyffany : You're super, man!
Tony : No! HOURMAN!
Ha. Then there's some admittedly funny outtakes as the credits roll.
Overall, this one's a mixed bag. It creased me up with laughter several times and the plot was slight but cute in it's own way. It's just a pity that the sex was all average to dull. Still, if you watch these sort of movies for the dialogue and FF through all the sex you might enjoy this. (You might also wantto see a shrink, a.s.a.p.!) I'll be nice and on the Imperial Scale give it a generous 2.00.
Happy viewing.