Cast: Chasey Lain, Tiffany Minx, Colt Steele, Steve St Croix, Amanda Addams, Jordan Lee, TT Boy
Jim Enright's a fine director in my opinion. He's come out with some good movies in the last few years. Immediately things like "Bikini Beach" come to mind for sexual impact alone, while classics like "Arabian Nights" win hands down in the humorous pornos of recent years. One of the Enright films that I liked a lot was a little movie called "Unforgettable" made a few years back with Jonathan Morgan (with long hair) and Alexis DeVell. A great little film with a clever script, a good soundtrack and some nice videography. But.... (and it's a big but) this movie sucks.
I've always thought it a great idea to set a porno movie in the 50's. You could have some kind of plot revolving around a dance contest (twisting, etc) and maybe set it in highschool. After all, the fifties had some very erotic symbolism going for it. The breaking of sexual taboos. The short pleated skirts. The wild innocence of it all. But this movie just tosses it all away in favour of repetetive, unmotivated sex. You'd at least expect it to have some 50's style rock and roll for a soundtrack but NO! just the same old corny porno music (TM) that we've heard in almost everything released since 1988. AAARGGH! How could they waste this many resources?!?!
Okay, let's move on to fact, instead of opinion. The film opens with Colt Steele (plank of wood) and Chasey Lain (plank of wood) having a conversation (in monosyllables of course) about him spending too much time at work or something, and never having time for her. This is followed by endless shots of Chasey masturbating as the credits roll. I guess this gives you something interesting to look at while reading the creds, but it's hardly red hot material. Nowhere near as good as, say, Traci Lords' masturbation scene in Robert McCallum's "Young and Restless II". That's all they should all be done,IMHO. But anyway, she then falls asleep and drifts back in time to the fifties. (Haven't we seen this sort of thing before with this girl. I call to the stand "Film Buff" in which she dreamt she was back in time appearing in classic films and "The Original Wicked Woman" where she just went back in time for the fun of it?) She's wearing a monstrous outfit that belongs on a surrealist catwalk more than it does in the fifties and she's also made-up to the nines in a very non-50's manner. The room that she wakes in is well furnished I suppose but her costume destroys the plausibility of it all. She walks into the next room where her two roommates are sitting (Tiffany Minx, looking quite nice, and a newcomer who according to the credits is called Lindsey May. I hope very much to NEVER EVER see this girl again. SHE'S REVOLTING!) (IMHO of course). They have a conversation in which Chasey says that women don't have enough rights in the 50's (YAWN!) and then they break in to (surprise!) a g/g/g scene. (After some dialogue like :
Tiffany : Girls shouldn't do this sort of thing with each other!
Chasey : They can where I come from.
Tiffany : I thought you came from Detroit.)
Tiffany looks nice, but Chasey's wearing FAR too much make up to be appealing and Lindsey May's just plain horrible. I can't stress this point enough!!! This scene goes on for way too long, then we move on to Chasey going down to the local diner. This set is quite nice, admittedly. The best thing in the film. Amanda Addams plays the waitress, who has a short conversation with Chasey, in which our girl from the future fills her up with some more women's lib bullshit. Amanda sees Steve St Croix and Colt sitting at a table and decides to spread some gossip about Steveroonie. Apparently he's a mechanic and when Jordan Lee can't pay the bill, he and his pal TT Boy decide to DP her. It's mercifully short, thank goodness, with no way of telling who's on top and who's underneath. The scene ends with double facials. TT's is fair, but severed completely by horrible editing (on behalf of Mr Enright himself) and Steve's looks good but again is cut off by the editing.
Still, we flash back to the restaurant, where Amanda says that she'd love a piece of that rebel wild boy, Steve. Incidentally, have I mentioned how much I like Steve St Croix yet? I think he's one of the finest actors in the business and should definately try his hand at mainstream (non-porn) movies. Here he's sporting the only authentic haircut in the film, too (A kind of Elvis-esque quiff). Anyhow, back to the plot. Chasey leaves with Colt after having an "all men are bastards" rant at him, leaving Amanda to screw Steve. She's not exactly my cup of tea, but she does her best and tries to look as if she's having fun at least, as Steve does her over the tables. The scene ends in what could have been a good facial, had the two best shots not sped straight past her. She does catch one load though. (as a note to all you facial fans out there, all the scenes in this movie finish in facials.)
We now skip to outside Chasey's house (Which by the way, looks VERY non-50's) where Tiffany and her boyfriend TT are inside. No real dialogue here, they just screw. WHY, OH WHY, take the best girl in the cast and couple her with a schmuck like TT Boy? What a mistake. This could have been enjoyable if, say, Steve St Croix had taken the duty, but TT ruins it with his idiot mug and annoyingly high-pitched vocal. They screw every which way but loose atop various kitchen furniture, before he eventually climaxes all over her face. An okay facial. Tiffany looks very hot, indeed. (Have I said that enough times already?)
The final scene.... Chasey takes Colt into the bedroom where she gives him yet more women's lib stuff (Which I have nothing against, usually, but this girl just seem to want to hammer it down every body's throats until we're all sick)until he mumbles something like "Iloveu" very quietly, and SNAP! Just like that, they start screwing. (Despite her saying that he treats her bad, and that women should think for themselves and all this? Hyprocrisy in action?) She starts off by sucking him then decides that he has to put on a condom if he wants to screw her. I'm all for safe sex in "real life" (TM) but I don't thinkthat condoms belong in the porn industry. He does one of the patented Colt Steele sixty second screws (See also "Boiling Point") before titty-fucking her (sans condom, incidentally) and trying pitifully to master a facial, but failing miserably and cumming on her neck instead. I'm really starting to dislike this guy.... We now flash forward to the present day where Colt gives Chasey a ring and they embrace at the end (her forgiving him for all his mistakes, despite earlier on claiming that he was an SOB.)
Overall verdict : A crappy movie with a feminazi script that Teri Diver could have written. Obviously Frank Bukkwyd (whoever he/she is) was responsible as Cash Markman couldn't lower himself to this sort of shit (I hope). The sex is crap, too, despite all scenes ending in facials. I'll be nice and give this a VERY generous 1.50 on the Imperial Scale.
Happy viewing.