Bus Stop Tails - Lisa

From: [email protected]
Subject: REVIEW - Bus StopTails- Lisa
Date: Wed, 26 Mar 97 02:45:59
Organization: DIGEX


Bus Stop Tales # 1, starring Lisa
Lisa, Ed Powers
Privert Video
Running Time: Approximately 120 minutes
Rating 2.5 out of 5 (3.5 if you like Asian women and/or submissives)

        This appears to be a reissuing of some very old material. First, Ed
starts into his spiel about being an ordinary guy, "a very ordinary guy"
with a knack for picking up women, and he chooses to do this at the bus
stop. This is about as believable as the nubile, young starlet dating the
60-year-old movie producer "only because he's a nice guy", but I imagine,
back in the day this was produced (yes, fans, this is THAT kind of recycled
porn movie), it was a nice fantasy. And, any woman stupid enough to get
into a strange man's car at a bus stop should feel ****ing blessed if she
only ends up in a porn movie. But I digress out of the fantasy.
        This time a very young, mustached, but still equally pudgy, Ed
Powers rolls up on a young woman of Korean descent named Lisa. Be warned -
she is VERY Korean-looking, so, if you don't like Asian women, she probably
won't seem that attractive to you. Her face isn't very pretty in that
California beach bimbo kind of way, but she can get a look of ecstacy of
her face that sends me right over the edge.
        Also, the acting and the dialogue are strained, in the same way
that a cable between the Space Shuttle and Pluto would be strained. But the
strained quality may be also due to her kittenish, in the worst sense,
manner. Fellas, ever had a woman try to be kittenish and coy and not pull
it off? (Yes, fans, it's THAT kind of personality analysis).
        So, they go through the spiel where he pulls up to the stop and
Lisa comes over to the car window and he persuades her to get in and go for
a ride. They end up back at his place, where she gets interviewed on a
couch in front of a black paper background, obviously for photographic
reasons.
        Lisa's wearing a short, black dress. The nipple makes its first
appearance in the last part of minute 12, for those of you having trouble
with the interview process, and pubic hair on minute 19.
        He gives her a Rambone dildo to play around with, but she doesn't
seem very eager, and, since the thing is probably a big as both of her
forearms, I won't begrudge her if she doesn't have the plastic munchies.
Then, around minute 18, Ed sucks on her nipple, goes to a little light
fingering and she goes from 10 to 60 in those few seconds. Boom, her
potential becomes instantly recognizable. Then, back to 10.
        She takes off her panties and sits there for a little bit, looking
very slim and Asian. She does a little light fingering. Ed comes over and
helps her and reveals another of her strong points -- a more than visible
clit. It's not like Holly Ryder's or Vanessa Del Rio's, but it 'taint
invisible, either (in case you're wondering, the reason why I like big
clits are because A: it's proof positive that the woman is aroused, and B:
it's easy to find and manipulate).
        She fingers herself and sucks off Ed for a while. We don't get to
see Ed (he introduces himself as "Mark" to her) until minute 26, just prior
to her sitting on him reverse cowgirl, and, when we do, it's a bit of a
shock. If it wasn't for the voice, the small penis, and the
stale-as-50-year-old-doughnuts jokes, how would we to know it is really him?
        They do eventually get busy. The couch doesn't work, but when they
get on the floor, they do get some missionary work in. Not consistently,
but enough for her to orgasm big a few times. Ed is just... Ed. He gets a
finger in her ass, but this was apparently a while ago, and she was a
novice, so anal was not on the schtupping manifest. She's really hot,
though. When sex was being had. She says Ed's dick is "so big" at least 3
times (I'm no Rocco Sifferedi or Sean Micheals, but forgive my snickers at
this); however, she appears to mean it. They get silly the rest of the
time; she even puts on a wig and some vampire teeth twice.
        So, why the low rating? The sex stops and starts, stops and starts.
Maybe he comes in her, maybehe doesn't. For me, any tape featuring one guy
and one girl should have some pretty amazing, or at least vigorous, sex in
it, and only her part is worthy of tape. The rest of it is boring. If I had
bought this for more than 10 bucks, I would have been MAADDD. The D.
Debutante format gives you a lot more bang for the buck, at least based on
this one tape. Other than the fact that I now seriously need to have sex
with her, this tape might have been a waste of my time.
        On another note, there's a part where she says she likes something,
but is too ashamed to say what it is. He whispers it to her almost
inaudibly and she nods, but, thanks to the fact that I have a sound system
and way too much free time, I was able to tell that it was either to get
"spanked" or "slapped," unless I'm greatly mistaken. This figures, because
she writhes and moans in fits of ecstasy when he slaps her butt, whispers
dirty things to her and pulls on her hair. So, Ed tells her to get up and
instructs her on how to cut off the camera.
        Now, let's be blunt. You can't really show real slapping and real
sex in American videos, because... Well, I don't specifically know because
why, but it branches off of the same reason why lots of other countries
view us, in a way, as puritanical hypocrites. It would have had to have
been edited out anyway. All videos are edited. BUT YOU NEVER GET UP AND
TURN OFF THE CAMERA if you can avoid it. Something truly orgasmic and
perfectly filmable could happen, and it would be lost forever. When the
director offers to cut it out forever beforehand, this shows he's willing
to cheat the viewer out of something. I have long suspected Ed Powers of
many things, but never of THAT. And it was apparently a long time ago
(1989?), and maybe one of his first videos, so maybe I can forgive this.
But the picture of the back of the box, a selling point for me, has a scene
that apparently has nothing to do with what's on the video. Obviously,
whatever they did was orgasmic enough for him to come all over her butt,
but I never got to see it, dammit. (Yes, Virginia, I'm THAT kind of
consumer).
        By the way, don't rent that new Tight Shots video of his. It is NOT
worth it and actually has some scenes in the beginning that aren't in the
video. Hmmm.

"And I am a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any... specific harm."
                         Moe the Bartender
                         The Simpsons"